Step 1: Health

I am not looking forward to doing this post one little bit. I dread it. In fact, I feel sick in the stomach as I am writing it. Do you ever feel so sick about something that you get this massive lump in your throat? I imagine this big gun metal grey (don't ask me why on the colour) big cement disc sitting in the back of my throat. Making it hard to swallow. Take a deep breath Lauren. Emotional eating. There, I said it. I know I've spoken about this many times before. Unfortunately this is not something that goes away easily. It's relentless. I had a fantastic week last week. I was killing it. 1200-1500 cals every day. Smashing it on the exercise. DOMS most days. I could feel my legs getting stronger. Before my weigh in I was so apprehensive but so excited because I had put the work in. Weigh in Wednesday - 69.7kgs. YES! A 1.1kg loss. Amazing. Well, not that amazing when the reality is if you do the work you get the results. But amazing that I&#

Reality hit me this week. The end of my London life is creeping up faster and faster. My partner and I are planning on finishing work late August, then commencing our huge summer trip before flying back to Australia for good. That means there's just over 4 months until my summer trip!! About 18 months ago my goal (wish) was to comfortably wear a bikini on said trip whilst lying on the beach of one of the Greek Islands. I say wish because I didn't really do anything about a plan to make this goal happen. I haven't worn a bikini since I was about 16. And then it was in the privacy of my back yard when no one was home. Put it this way - I've never publicly worn a bikini. In fact, the last time I wore even a one piece swimsuit in public was swimming laps with a close friend years ago. And then I wore board shorts to cover my thighs until I got in the water, took them off whilst in the pool and left them on the edge of the lane we were swimming laps in, then put them back on

You know what - I don't actually suck at life! I was just reading my last post. Why did I speak so horribly about myself? Focusing on my recent flaws. Pointing out a huge list of things I care about doing but have been too stressed and busy to get done. It happens to the best of us. Tasks build and build and build, we get busy, they create this imaginary weight on our shoulders and we get to this point where it all feels like it's too much and we can't see the forest from the trees.        Well - I can see that forest now. I can do amazing things. We all can if we put our mind to it. In less than four years I have: lost 24kgs - kept off 20 progressed my career in ways I never would have imagined I would get to in a short time worked my way out of a stressful debt situation to being 100% debt free trained myself into being a runner done an obstacle course - something I was quite fearful of been skiing & comfortably rode chair lifts (another thing I was fea

Don't laugh. This is how I really feel. I actually feel like I suck at it. I'm just really no good at it. To paint a picture:  Every morning I am running around like a headless chook trying to get to work on time. Oh I need gym gear? Some of it’s in this room. Some is in that room. The rest is in that pile I've been meaning to clean up for days. Lunch? Oh shit I need to scrape some lunch together. What about my keys? Where did I leave them? Oh crap I forgot to charge my phone last night! Need to find my charger cord so it doesn't die today at work.  I almost always eat breakfast on the run because if leave any later I'll be later to work than I already am. I'm a manager too so it kills me inside that I'm setting such a bad example.  My only work skirt I have to wear is dirty. I forgot to wash it on wknd. So I'm heading to work in a dirty skirt with marks on it. Which brings me to another point - I have needed to buy work clothes for yonks